Not wanting to do the hard work

Are you prepared to do the hard work needed to achieve what you want in life?

I realise sometimes (or even often) the answer for me is "no" - so what can I/we do to move that to a "yes" - to increase the chances of having the life we want?

For me it started five years ago with the following words from a surgeon "you need new knees, but are too young to have them. Keep taking the painkillers, and come back when it gets too much for you."

Thus started my exploration of what to do for my arthritic knees - an exploration of how to reduce the pain in other ways than doing what the specialist suggested. Also an exploration to keep my knees away from the operating table.

The first thing I did was set up an Arthritis Pinterest board and put links to all ideas I came across for reducing knee pain via body, mind, heart and soul. In other words, looking at it from all angles, and yes even angels :-).

Finding all the options was the easy bit - even if not one of them was suggested by the surgeon, nor doctor. 

From that time on there there's been many many ups and downs as I've searched for alternatives. In that search I've found many things that work for either increasing range of movement, flexibility, stamina, or reducing pain. These have included: 

• Keeping my joints moving - whether with friends, alone, in exercise classes or with the help of a personal trainer (as per picture above)
• Doing hip mobilisation exercises - which ensure my glutes and hips are strong, flexible and switched on
• Yoga - isolating weak or overly tense muscles, and releasing and then strengthening them
• Regular sports massage to increase range of movement and release tight muscles 
• Improved sleep - earlier to bed and black out curtains helping significantly to do this

I've tried many supplements and have found that they each work for awhile, and then have seen their efficacy reduce. Perhaps placebo might explain this better than efficacy of the supplements, although due to the sustained improvement I would recommend trying:

• Solgar 7

Other successes, or perhaps that should be other things I know work, have included:

• Avoiding gluten - even if I would dearly love this not to be the case, and have repeatedly tried to test the hypothesis in the vain hope I'm wrong 
• Avoiding rhubarb - who knew? 
• Avoiding the nightshade family - potatoes, tomatoes, peppers and so on 
• Adding more ginger to juices 
• Eating or drinking beetroot
• Keeping hydrated 

The problem has been, that whilst some of these activities are definitely on the "should do" list, or if I think about hip mobilisation even on the "must do" list, I still manage not to do them. It's as if, despite the benefit, I'm not prepared to put in the sustained effort required to keep doing them. This results in a few weeks of progress, freer movement and minimal pain followed by weeks and months of restricted movement and pain! One step forward, two, three or even four steps back :-(.

I find myself wondering if I should simply buy into the surgeons belief that new knees are the only answer, and accept I'm simply on the declining and steady route to the operating table.

Currently there is a part of me that still whispers "No" to the surgeon's belief, but these days it's getting quieter and sounding further way. 

Whilst I can still hear the "No" therefore I will continue to search for a solution that will get me back on track. After all that's what I help others do in my coaching - to get back on track - even if not often physically. 

The process I follow in coaching sessions is:

• Where do you want to get to - desired outcome
• Where are you now - current situation
• How do you get from one to the other
• What's stopping you - the hurdles and resistors 
• Taking action 
• Reviewing progress 
• Amending action 

What's stopping us taking the necessary action normally falls into a number of areas:

• We're not clear enough about what we want 
• We're not clear enough about what to do or can't see the wood for the trees 
• We're not clear enough of the benefits to be achieved from getting to the desired outcome 
• We're not motivated to take action - values after all inspire our every action 
• Something is holding us back - fear, lack of confidence, past events, anger, beliefs, negativity , stuck in a loop, our comfort zone etc 
• We don't believe it's possible or can't won't do it or think we're too old to try!
• Others we admire don't believe it's possible 
• We can't/don't take the first step or feel like we're going around in circles
• We don't sustain our actions or give up too soon 

As I've watched the BBC's 'the doctor who gave up drugs' this week I realised the missing jigsaw piece for me was not being prepared to put in sustained hard work.

I now realise I was looking for a quick fix. I'd forgotten the adage that it takes 28 days for something to become a habit. My understanding is that until that time, we'll find it easier to fall back to the old habit than continue with the new one. I'd also forgotten that whilst still in its thrall the old habit may even lie to us, and try and persuade us of the folly of our actions - focusing on our lack of progress, and highlighting the inconsistencies. Basically doing anything that will undermine our belief in the validity of the new habit we're aiming for. 

So yes I do need to remind myself of what life could be like without the current restricted movement in my knees, and to tap into my values to provide the motivation. More importantly, however, I need to make a commitment to change a few habits, and to do that effectively I also need to tell others about that commitment (I think this blog works for that - especially if you'll occasionally check in to see how I'm getting on). 

Which means for the next 28 days I commit to changing a few persistently bad habits, and starting a few new ones, namely:

• I will eat gluten free every day (ie not go of the rails when I see a piece of white bread or chocolate cake)
• I will do my hip mobilisation once daily
• I will keep sufficiently hydrated 
• I will do one thing differently every day (to keep the 'do new things' muscle working - and perhaps more importantly to keep the 'do the same things' muscle out of its comfort zone) 

No excuses, no doubts about their efficacy - just 28 days, and then observing the results, and adapting my plan from there. 

The coach in me says I should start with just one of the above not all four, but currently I feel confident that I can sustain all four for the next 28 days - especially as 3 of them are already activities I do - even if inconsistently applied. 

Will you join me? What one habit would you like to replace, and what daily action can you take to make that a reality?

Alison x

Alison Smith

The Purchasing Coach

Inspiring change - inside and out 

Hypertext links in the text above link to previous blogs written on the subject either here on The Purchasing Coach site or over on my Landscaping Your Life site where I use nature as a metaphor and teacher for our lives.

#28daychallenge

Are you a toxic leader?

Toxic leadership isn't something to be proud of - is it? 

Certainly not when we look at the definition of toxic: poisonous, dangerous, destructive, harmful, malignant, pernicious, deadly! Not something we need in any organisation?

Yet many leaders see that heartless and ruthless streak to be a valuable asset to their organisation - and it can be - in a short term, bottom line, profit only sort of a way!

I recently attended Let's talk about it - changing attitudes towards our mental health at work.

During the session Professor Denis Fischbacher-Smith of The University of Glasgow's Adam Smith, as part of his presentation on: mental health in the workplace: the hidden problem for management education, put up this slide:

That is toxic leaders have:

• Self-centered attitudes, motivations and behaviours
• A lack of concern for others
• Inflated sense of self-worth
• Acute self-interest

Which sounds about right to me - you?

I do wish it were simpler to rid business of such leadership.

If it were then we'd be able to say without hesitation that the financial institutions' leadership are less toxic as a result of the crash in 2008? I'm not sure we can? do you?  

The biggest challenge to ridding the business world of toxic leaders is we don't really have many easy options open to us:

• Changing the toxic leaderships's behaviours
• Changing the toxic leadership's values and beliefs 
• Replacing toxic leadership
• Get the toxic leadership sacked 

Not really anything that easily fits within our individual areas of influence? We can try, but changing other people is never something that's easy to do - even when we have the authority to try. As I write in "Is your head in the sand" toxic leadership is not something many leaders will self identify with - so you've not got much leverage there either.

You only have to look at many of the current, and former, runners for president of the United States of America to realise that power and money, or should that be money and power, are a toxic mix that can get these leaders very far indeed. 

It's no different in many organisations - although I realise there are exceptions (e.g. B Corporation,  Arianna Huffington's Thrive and the third metric, The BTeam's plan B and so on to name but a few).

So if the above are not easy solutions you and I can have any influence over - what can we do? 

Well ...

.... You're not going to like it.......

I assure you you're not going to like my answer ....

.. I really mean it - you're not going to like it...

Here goes.... 

.... A deep breath 

......and my answer is.....

Ensure you're not condoning any of the behaviours demonstrated by these toxic leaders - ie stop behaving like these toxic leaders.

I did warn you.

Here's the logic for my rather bold statement:

If any of us demonstrate any of the following traits:

• Self-centered attitudes, motivations and behaviours
• A lack of concern for others
• Inflated sense of self-worth
• Acute self-interest

How can we criticise another for doing so.

It's too easy to say the repercussions are greater for those with power, and therefore forgive ourselves our little indiscretions.

That then begs the question "where is the line?" - when does someone move from good self interest to bad self interest, or move from acceptable lack of concern for others to unacceptable lack of concern for others?

I did type "How do we then teach our children where the line is", and that's taken the blog in a different direction as I ponder if the increase in bullying at schools is because we are teaching them to have:

• Self-centered attitudes, motivations and behaviours
• A lack of concern for others

Perhaps in the belief that others can look after themselves, and the impact isn't so great.

The problem of course is those bullies grow up.

The lack of action either towards little Alice's bullying, or our own indiscretions are found in the following excuses reasons:

• They shouldn't have done x 
• They had it coming to them
• They're not very nice people
• I didn't intend my actions to have that outcome 
• Everyone else is doing it
• No one will know
• They can look after themselves
• It won't hurt anyone
• I need to keep a roof over my head
• It's not the same when I do it

I'm sure the toxic leaders started by thinking the same!

Perhaps the answer lies in an earlier blog about stopping playing games at work? Or even in 'is your head in the sand' if you really are one of these toxic leaders, and don't know it!

Do you agree with this definition of toxic leadership, and what do you think the solution to toxic leadership is?

Alison Smith

The Purchasing Coach
Inspiring change inside and out - and here's why I think inspiring change is important

And just to provide a different perspective I used the metaphor of toxic plants in this blog, over on Landscaping Your Life where I use nature to inspire change, to see if a different insight could be gained from a less defensive analysis. I certainly felt less irritated having explored the situation metaphorically - see what you think.

A blog I wrote some time ago was entitled "don't turn a blind eye" and invited us to speak up against toxic behaviours in business. And my blog 'is there room for kindness in procurement' was an invitation to bring your humanity to work every day.

Let's talk about it

I Let's talk about it - changing attitudes towards our mental health at work

The title of the conference says it all, and was certainly the conclusion that could be drawn from all the speakers - some speaking from personal experience, others academically involved, and others in corporate life. Everyone concluded:

• Let's talk about mental health at work  
• Let's change attitudes about mental health at work

I attended the above conference at the University of Glasgow on Wednesday - it had been co-arranged by the University and Amy McDonald founder of Headtorch, an organisation that enables people to feel good, AND be productive at work.

The fundamental belief we're being asked to accept in the conference title is:

100% ie every one of us - not just some of us - all of us.

100% of the time too - ie there's no taking a holiday from our mental health. We have it at work, rest and play. That is - it's with us where ever we go.

Our mental health is variable too - a continuum that changes day to day, week to week, year to year.

There's things we can all do to support our own mental health, and there's thing we can do that hinder it.

There's also things we can do to support other people's mental health, and certainly things we can do that distress other's mental health.

The challenge is that we don't talk about mental health, and therefore don't find out what supportive behaviours we could be demonstrating. Which means if your actions are negatively impacting my mental health you don't get to find out, and if I could do something to support yours, I don't ask, and therefore never find out what I could do differently!

We're all blindly making assumptions about supportive and acceptable business behaviours, and yet don't fully understand what they are! Allowing fear of recrimination and stigma to stop us having those very important conversations.

That's where talking about it comes in - and it doesn't have to be big:

Here's a few of the ways that were highlighted on the day of how we could be talking about mental health at work

• If you're worried about someone, and even if you don't know what you might be able to do, asking "Are you okay" can have such a profound impact (see See Me Scotland's video "Are you okay" - explicit or clean version). Profound because ignoring the person can significantly and negatively impact the person's mental health further. 

That was the biggest, simplest and yet most often ignored action we can all take to "overcome the fear of doing the wrong thing." Other suggestions included:

• Saying "I'm here to listen" or asking "What would help most?"
• Say "No" more often - ie look after your own mental health, and don't be pressurised into saying "Yes" when you mean "No". Or at least say "Let me think about it" to give yourself more time to determine the appropriate response that supports your mental health.
• Talk as a team, and/or just with your manager, about the behaviours that support yours and other's mental health
• Talk as a team, and /or with your manager, about the less than helpful behaviours, and what behaviours could be substituted instead  
• Find ways of talking about your own mental health with others - regardless of how healthy or unhealthy it is 
• Talk about mental health in supervisor, management and leadership training 

The key being to talk about these NOW - ie it's not about waiting until the lack of a conversation is causing problems! It's also about having it as part of ongoing dialogue - it's not something you do once, tick and box, and move onto the next item on your to-do list!

When will you next talk about mental health - and who will you be having that conversation with?

For more information on how HeadTorch could help your organisation to talk about mental health do get in touch with Amy McDonald +44 (0)141 255 2909 amy@headtorch.org

Alison Smith
Inspiring change inside and out

I was official tweeter, otherwise know as the OT(!), at Let's talk about it - so do please also have a look at #mentalhealthatwork to see what was said, and also follow other # who were talking on the subject on the same day #BellLetsTalk (trending from Canada with over 6m tweets on the day) #itaffectsme,
and on 4th February in the UK #TimeToTalk.

As a result of attending the conference I wrote a number of accompanying blogs (expressing my personal views and exploration of the topics raised) this cover Buyers' responsibility towards suppliers' mental health, Toxic leadership, Watch your language (about the self fulfilling prophecies we manifest by the language we use.) and Is your head in the sand about our own contribution to the behaviours we judge in others.

In 2013 I also attended Amy's conference Work's Mental, and wrote a blog entitled "it's not about the toast" based on the topic of a learning and development session. It used, and continues to do so, interactive theatre to get people talking about this subject.

Picture at the top of the page shows Mindapple's tree that we were encouraged to tie our own mindapples on (day to day activities that are good for our minds) - here's my mind apples - written some time ago.

Professional Effectiveness

Effectiveness has many contributory factors - process, skill, commitment, motivation to name a few.

Process is an area I think we take for granted and often ignore. Its perhaps too easy to muddle through until we find there's a more effective way of doing what ever we're doing.

This statement equally applies to business as it does pleasure. Whether purchasing or cooking, training or exercising, public speaking or driving there's a most effective way of doing it, and there's many sub optimal ways of doing it. 

The challenge is knowing the difference between effectiveness and suboptimal ways? 

Of the list above I'd suggest there's only one where a large majority of people understand that they don't know enough to muddle through and take lessons - driving. For all the other skills listed many muddle through believing that's enough whether they're purchasing, cooking, training, exercising or public speaking. 

Of course muddling though is ok unless you're getting paid to do it and then effectiveness at the skill is what being a professional is all about. Every one of the professions above has a multitude of processes and best ways of doing things that attending training or having a coach can help you develop.

Cooking is one profession that has done so much to ensure everyone understands there's more to it than we first thought - Masterchef, The Great British Bake Off and the multitude of other cooking shows have seen to that.

Procurement still suffers from the opposite. Everyone personally buys for themselves and therefore many assume when paid to do it by their organising that muddling through is ok. I don't mean the members of the procurement department, who have generally undertaken some form of training, I mean all the others who get involved in purchasing - others in an organisation who think procurement:

• Is just about getting three quotes
• Makes decisions based on only lowest price
• Involves shouting at and bullying suppliers
• Can easily and retrospectively renege on a contract especially on payment terms (directed at finance and leadership teams)
• Isn't a profession and anyone can do it

It's the one challenge procurement as a profession has failed to address. How to ensure those making procurement decisions are sufficiently trained or supported by those who have been.

I wrote earlier this week about many in procurement not undertaking sufficient stakeholder engagement. At the time the focus was on getting internal stakeholders input into sourcing and supplier strategies. Which stops procurement going off and doing their own thing. There's another challenge however and that's how to stop internal stakeholders going off and doing their own thing too. 

The blogs next week will therefore look at the different solutions available to improving stakeholder engagement in procurement as a profession.

Alison Smith

Inspiring change when what you're doing isn't working

Sleep - allowing more room for new information

I went to bed early last night - before 2300 anyway - and woke at 0630. I had also, unlike many nights previously, not woken in the night mind whirling about things to do.

Having written a blog on the signs that the constant doing has taken over I realised this morning I'd totally forgotten about sleep!! Despite it being a frequent topic in coaching sessions with clients.

I've always been an early to bed sort of girl - early being before 2230 and ideally before 2200 and waking around 0630. 

I'd not noticed as the 'doing' took over the slow movement of my going to bed time. 2200 became 2215 and then 2230. Before I knew it it was 2345 and then 0030!! A slow reduction in the number, and quality, of hours asleep.

Whilst scientists don't know definitively why we need sleep they know we do need it. Not least to put into long term memory today's stuff! It's a bit like filing emails into folders. If your emails stay in the inbox sooner or later you just can't find anything, or you exceed your capacity and can't receive any new emails until you've emptied your inbox. 

 

Our brain is the same and sleep provides the opportunity to undertake this filing - improving access to your memory, and allowing for new memories and information to be stored, and avoiding overload.

Going to bed after 0000 isn't a problem but for me it is when I'm doing it every night.

 

I'm aiming for 2200 bedtime tonight. You? 

Alison Smith

Inspiring change inside and out

The cost of getting purchasing wrong

The hardest task I and my procurement and purchasing colleagues have is convincing our stakeholders and other managers of the positive benefit to the business of applying more rigour to how they purchase. The skills I have developed over 27 years are seemingly discounted with a belief that goes something like "anyone can purchase" or as someone said the other day "it's just shopping."

Until it goes wrong that is when the realisation starts to dawn that we might have helped them avoid the hole they're now in.

How we get around the problem I really don't know - we've been trying for so long and yet the profession doesn't really seem any more well recognised than when I started, other than in the larger corporates.

So here's how I'm going to try........ I've set up a Pinterest board and when I find examples of the impact of purchasing gone wrong I'll add to it. That way we'll all have an expanding visual reminder of what effective purchasing can help businesses avoid.

Today I've added examples of buyers going to jail, project overspend, contract termination, accusations of wrong doing in the media, delays, cancellation costs, ministers apologising on your behalf and complete service failure! And that's just been in the media over recent weeks! oh yes and one company's share price slumped due the cost implications of a product recall.

The most bizarre decision made of the examples found so far has to go to one authority who felt it acceptable to claim a deduction of £84,450 for a mousse that was 24 hours out of date. No wonder the court upheld the ability of the supplier to terminate on the grounds of breech of contract. Just think though of the cost to the business of retendering - one reason for getting it right first time I'd suggest.

Alison Smith
The Purchasing Coach
Sowing the seeds of effective purchasing in your business

Share price picture Source: bbc.co.uk via Alison on Pinterest