Keeping Afloat

I’m feeling a little jittery & off balance at the moment & in need of daily grounding to keep afloat.

I’m sure I’m not alone in finding Coronavirus a little daunting – working & living alone is certainly allowing that jitteryness to take hold even more.

I wondered therefore what I could do to add to the mix of support available & decided to share insights from a coaching tool I use in coaching and workshops.

It’s called the frameworks for change coaching process * & involves exploring the words on a series of cards to help us to tap into our inner wisdom.

An inner wisdom that is able to connect us to our inner calm.

I’ll be sharing a set of cards every day for at least the next couple of weeks.

Today’s insights to keep afloat are:

• Insight: You successfully resisted the temptation to gossip.

• Potential setback: Setback by comparison on the current situation.

• Insight: I measure my success by how much I enjoy my work.

• Mentor: Enthusiasm

Reflect on your own thoughts about these cards as these will always be more powerful for you than my own.

I have however shared my thoughts on a YouTube video (see below and also my YT channel here) & below.

Insight: You successfully resisted the temptation to gossip.

In this context gossip for me is about conversations where we’re telling a story and as we do so we add energy to the story. It’s as if we’re adding in more dark corners and angrier and bigger monsters with every telling. Which eventually has us afraid to go out and jumping at every loud noise. If we stop telling the story and stick to the facts, and focus on the actions we personally can take on a day to day basis, some of the jitteriness will dissipate.

Potential setback: Setback by comparison on the current situation. 

Do not look at others and see them as somehow being better off than you. We each have our own journey, and the media (social and otherwise) is always going to look as if most people are coping well. The chances are that a large majority of people are feeling like you are.  

Insight: I measure my success by how much I enjoy my work.

Some of the usual means of measuring success like hours at work, promotions, financial investments increasing, earnings, or even pats on the back may be a little light on the ground at the moment. What happens if we focus on the enjoyment we’re getting from what we’re doing, focusing more on what success today looks like rather than success next week, next month or next year.

Mentor: Enthusiasm

For me this links to the earlier cards – how can we tap into our enthusiasm today.

Find that one thing that when all around is fraught gives us joy. It might not be huge - it could be playing with your children/cat, or eating a favourite dessert or even watching your favourite film. Anything that will help shift from jangly and jittery to a more joyful mindset.

I'm posting on LinkedIn , Facebook and YouTube daily so pop over there to have a daily dose of insight to help keep you afloat. I'll pop back and share occasionally here.

* The process, the insight, setback and mentor cards used here are from Frameworks for Change © Innerlinks - www.innerlinks.com.

You can get a less businessy set of very similar cards online from Amazon or in person as Findhorn Phoenix shop - the cards are called Intuitive Solutions (Amazon UK, Amazon US).

Judgement and assumption

I remember when I first started coaching 20 years ago I was lucky to often have the confidence of both parties to disagreements within the team. One person asserting their truth. The other their own. Since then a new word has emerged to describe what I observed - false news. And then acting as if that news, our assumptions, are the truth of a situation. It’s something we all do. Every day. Not the media. You

And I. False news that says a situation is as we judge it to be. Someone does or says something and without any further questioning we are sure in our own assessment. That reaction means this. This behaviour means that. That word said with that tone means the other. How soon relationships can degenerate based on such assumptions. No listening. No clarifying. No questioning. Simply an assumption in our own rightness with no communication. “How do you know that? What evidence have you got to support your judgement and assumptions ?” are questions I often ask in coaching sessions. Judgement and Assumptions are two of the 26 ZIGs I’ve identified that Inhibit our Growth and stop us flourishing.
“How do I know that?” is therefore a great question to ask yourself to start the journey of awareness and start zagging.

Are you easily distracted?

11 minutes 25 seconds felt like an eternity. It was the duration of an activity I was doing as part of my do something different every day in January. What’s the longest you’ve read without distraction? Or should that be, what’s the longest you’ve read without distraction taking you off to start another task whilst the article/chapter gets left on hold until (or if) you return to it? It’s funny how these challenges go. Last time I did something different every day the biggest insight was how often I said no to things. A pattern I have since tried to break, and am certainly more aware of my default of “no I don’t want to do/try/go...” This time, it would seem I’m pushing at the attention/ focus pattern - or lack of such. Interestingly the Saturday paper magazine I chose to read cover to cover included an article that took those 11+ minutes to read and was on Tristan Harris on “attention capitalism”. Exploring the very subject that my challenge seems to be inviting me to unlock. That’s why I love the doing something different every day challenge because it provides me/us with an opportunity to push at unconscious habits. From past experience the habits we resist most are the habits most in need of review. What will you do differently today? hashtag#letsgetzagging