How to get back on track

These pictures might not look much but they represent the difference between being stuck and getting back on track for one client.

I often share on my blog some of the coaching tools I use - whether that's metaphors, language, collage, Frameworks for change, standing in their shoes and so on.

I don't use them just because they're different - I use them because they're effective.

One common reason for their effectiveness is the way in which they bypass the barriers or resistance we have to making the changes we need to make. After all, very simplistically, if we weren't resisting (in one some form or other) we'd already have what we say we want (obviously sometimes coaching is about defining what we want in the first place).

Yesterday I used a very frequent friend of mine - and I'm not sure I even have a name for it - lots of theory behind why it works - but over time it's morphed into the following process.

1. Identify how satisfied you are with your life on a scale of 0-10.
2. Identify key areas of your life and write them on post-its (using size of writing, colour of writing, size, shape, colour and position on the flip chart  to differentiate between them). Areas may include: work, health, fitness, finance, home, hobbies, friends, family, relationship, contribution, spirituality and so on.  
3. You may also, or instead, wish to include post-its for feelings - eg joy, laughter, freedom, openness, safety etc (see this post for a different way of using this process to explore your values, and the impact they may be having on your life at the moment).  
4. Review the pattern you see in the post-its. How might the current pattern explain why things are, and aren't, happening the way they are? That is - is something blocking you seeing another post it, is one bigger or smaller than others, do colours make any difference - and so on?
5. What changes might you want to make to the original representation? Don't just do this logically - let you heart get involved, and see if there's changes it would suggest you make. Taking care that you don't discount something that's very meaningful to you (which is easier to type than do in practice, especially if you're trying to do this on you own). 
6. Make the changes, and notice what you notice. Might further changes be needed? Just keep going till it either looks, feels or sounds just right when you review it. 
7. How satisfied do you now feel with your life? 
8. What actions have arisen as you've developed this new representation? When will you take them? (NB the answer may be "none", because the changes have happened unconsciously. In which case I'd invite you to set a date with yourself to review progress in a few days or weeks time once everything has settled. (I recently had a very intensive sports massage session, and it wasn't until 2 weeks later that I realised the tension has finally gone completely. It had slowly done it's magic over the 2 weeks once the massage guy had started the release. )

What action can you take today to bypass the barriers or resistance you have to having the life you want?

Alison Smith

The Purchasing Coach

Inspiring change inside and out, and using nature to do that via Landscaping your life too.

The Dark Hedges

The Dark Hedges in Northern Ireland have made it through to the short list for #treeoftheyear. I hope since they've become part of the Game of Thrones history that they're better signposted than when we visited a number of years ago. 

I wondered as I looked at the pictures on Twitter how the hedges could be used for Landscaping your life (LYL). 

LYL is a process that uses landscapes and nature as a metaphor for our lives. Along the lines of being as grounded as a tree, going with the flow like a river, as deep as the ocean, as changeable as the weather and so on. 

There are a number of different ways LYL can be used to help you get out of a rut and back on track, or help you to see the wood for the trees etc.

Let's see what how the Dark Hedges might be of assistance.

First think of a situation you'd like more clarity on - you may be stuck or simply want to get on track quicker or more easily, or you may not quite know which direction you want to go. What ever the situation bring it to mind and get a sense of what level of clarity and satisfaction you currently have for it.

Now put the situation to the back of your mind and join me as we explore the landscape. We'll come back to the real life situation later once we've allowed nature to provide us with some insight. 

As you look at the picture of the Dark Hedges what come to mind? For example you may notice:

• The straight road up the middle
• The crooked branches
• The connected branches 
• The green leaves
• The grey bark

If you imagine this image representing the current situation what do you notice? Has it improved your ability to understand the solution that's needed? Does the image feel more or less satisfactory or clear?  

If it's feeling more satisfactory already you may want to see if any of the following suggestions increase your level of satisfaction, or simply return now to the original situation and notice what you notice. 

If nothing has changed, or perhaps satisfaction has reduced, consider what changes you might want to make to the image. These might include (and feel free to try each of the suggestions as you read through the list)

• Adding more or less colour or even making back and white
• Changing the size of the image
• Changing the location of the image 
• Zooming in or out 
• Making it more or less focused
• Making it into a movie so you can explore the landscape more fully
• Adding sounds
• Changing the weather
• Changing the time of day
• Changing the type of tree
• Adding or taking away trees
• Making the road longer or shorter
• Making the road more bendy

In other words keep changing the image until satisfaction with the image has increased, and stop once satisfaction has peaked. 

Don't worry if this feel strange - especially if you can't make sense of why making these changes can change your level of satisfaction. Basically your mind is able to make the connection and is doing all the hard work for you. 

Relax and continue to explore the image knowing that as you do so different connections in your brain are being made that will enable you to view the original situation differently.

How satisfied with the image do you now feel? 

If you're still not feeling any more satisfied you may want to imagine moving around the landscape - either by walking or even flying (as a bird or bee) or even using a mini camera drone. 

Or perhaps you need to imagine travelling into a completely different landscape? 

Just keep making changes until clarity and satisfaction have improved.

Now return to thinking about the original situation - notice what you notice? What is clearer now, and perhaps more importantly what actions can you now take to move forward?

I'd love to hear how you get on with this - it's always harder to explain how to do it remotely like this - much easier in person as we walk through a landscape. 

Perhaps that's my next task to do a video blog demonstrating it in practice. (I will add a link here once I've done that). 

Although there's plenty of other LYL video blogs using nature to get insight about life on my LYL YouTube channel. There's more on Facebook and Pinterest too.

Do get in touch if you're interested in knowing more about individual or group coaching and facilitation using this process, or other innovative tools that enable you or your team to be more inspired and get back on track alison@alisonsmith.eu +44 (0)7770 538159 

Postscript: a Landscaping Your Life website was launched in November 2015 - so for more on this effective process do please go and visit.

Can't see the wood for the trees

I've used landscapes as metaphors for change with clients for over 15 years. Yet I'm still surprised at the effectiveness, creativity and speed that solutions can be found.

We use landscapes all the time in the language we use - stuck in a rut, out on the limb or can't see the wood for the trees and so on. This week on Facebook I've been exploring solutions when we can't see the wood for the trees. 

The premise is if we're using the saying then at some level in our mind it represents the current situation. If we're currently stuck, therefore, one way to get unstuck is to change the image representing it.

It's much better to get a sense of how the process works if you try it for yourself. So why not think of a situation you could describe as not being able to see the wood for the trees about.

How satisfied do you feel about the situation - on a scale of 0/10 - and what benefit would it provide if you felt more satisfied? 

Now put that situation to the back of your mind, and bring to the front of your mind an image of the trees you can't see the wood for. I know it may feel a little strange but trust me you will have an answer - either because you can construct an image or intuitively can just give an answer. Trust it will, and does, make sense to your mind. 

As you reflect on your Internal image or landscape look at the following pictures - what changes may they be suggesting you make to your current image? 

No need to rush - take your time and allow landscapes, perspectives and ideas to come to mind. There's no right or wrong - we're just exploring the situation as a metaphor, as trees in a wood, rather than in reality.

I'm curious .... How satisfied are you as you now think of the original situation? Curious because you may not need to follow the rest of the process outlined below - ie your unconscious may already have done the job and shifted something - which means you already can see the wood for the trees - or may be starting to anyway.

Otherwise bring to mind your original image of the trees - you may notice some subtle or not so subtle changes have already taken place - what other changes may you want to make to that image? 

Perhaps more or less colour or movement, louder or softer sounds, bigger or smaller image. Or perhaps viewed from a different perspective or a different time of day or year or cooler or warmer. One client for example changed the type of trees to beech, and that made all the difference and inspired immediate action. In other words play around with the image. I know that sounds weird but we're simply making changes to an image we've constructed, and since the original image depicts a stuck state then making changes will enable you to get unstuck.

Just curious ... How satisfied do you feel about the situation now?

At this point if we were in a coaching session I'd spend more time on the metaphor with you - but without knowing what direction would be best for you to explore the trees then we could just get more lost in the wood ;-). So let's just return to the original situation - unless of course you have time to go for a walk in a wood and notice what difference that might make (I had a great session the other week doing this with 6 members of the Scottish Institute of Business Leaders, and many years ago with the whole board of management of the Chartered Institute of Purchasing and Supply).

What actions in the current situation or different perspectives have come to mind as you've reviewed the images or made the changes. More importantly what will be your first step?

I'm curious - how satisfied do you feel about the situation? 

You might want to remember that if you procrastinate too much longer the wood may just become like these trees ..... Unless of course that's the solution?

Have fun and do let me know how you get on.
Alison

More on Landscaping Your Life can be found on Facebook and Pinterest - see the right hand side of this page for links to these (unless anyone can tell me how to add HTML links using the Blogger app of course). I'll be starting a new Landscaping Your Life blog very soon so watch this space.

One other suggestion is to play around with the saying.....

• Can't see the trees for the wood
• Can't see the wood for the forest 
• Can't see the bark for the trees
• Can't see the fish for the water
• Like a tree out of a wood
• Can't see the rut for the mud
• Stuck in a tree
• Up a creek without a tree
• Can't see the wood for the creek
• And so on - the more absurd the better (the aim being to just change the internal representation you have for the situation - once you've done that then you're on your way from being stuck to getting back on track, or even going with the flow - if that isn't mixing metaphors too much).

Do please contact me if you're interested in individual or group sessions using the process - great for problem solving, strategy or goal setting, and for times when more inspiration or creativity are needed - alison@alisonsmith.eu +44 (0) 7770 538159

Postscript: a Landscaping Your Life website was launched in November 2015 - so for more on this effective process do please go and visit.

Up a creek without a paddle

When coaching clients or facilitating groups I'm always on the lookout for the language being used to describe the challenge being faced. It's the quickest way to access the underlying issues, that taking words at face value may take hours to uncover.

I'm, therefore, continuing the theme today of using the very metaphors we're comparing a situation to in order to solve it. If you think you're in a rut then use that metaphor to explore the options that exist to get out of a rut. If you're making a mountain out of a molehill then let's not get caught up in the content of the issue let's just look at the patterns that exist that provide insight on how to stop doing that!

Today we're looking at being "up a creek without a paddle". As with the other phrases I've looked at here the very use of the phrase presupposes that you're stuck, with nowhere to go and no ability to get out of the situation.

In reality if we were up a creek without a paddle then there's many ways we could get out of the creek. Here's one solution (the landscaping your life process would enable you to identify many more solutions).

STOP!

Think about it. If we’re drifting aimlessly or even going around in circles until we stop then we can’t really plot a route out or even understand what’s happening. We’re at the mercy of external forces.

If you’re in the boat there’s going to be a number of different ways to stop. You may have anchor but it’s unlikely so you may have to ground yourself. On the other hand you may be able to moor or tether the boat if you can.

STOP is about a breathing space to assess the situation. It’s about grounding ourselves so we can act from a place of calm and peace not from a place of fear.

Life Jacket

Once we’ve stopped many of the solutions we may identify will be easier if we had a life jacket on.
That is on the way out of the creek, as the going gets rough, without a life jacket confidence can become dented and we may soon end up back up the creek. We don’t have the confidence to stay out there in the rapids. We prefer to come back to the safety of the creek than hang on for open water.

That’s where a life jacket would come in handy because it gives us confidence that even if we end up in the water we’ll be ok. That is we can cope with anything.

The life jacket is about getting into a resourceful and confident state where we know we can cope with anything that life throws at us. (My prescription for positivity may help here.)

Mission

Once we’re ready to start thinking about leaving the creek we need to understand what our mission is. It’s only once we know our mission that we can look at a map and understand the routes that will best enable us to meet it.

It’s no use just grabbing the paddle and getting the hell out of the creek. Without a mission how will we know what direction to take at the first fork? How will we know it’s not another creek?

All heroes on our TV’s seem to have a mission to save the world from the bad guys. We therefore know when they meet a bad guy that they’re going to take action. There’s no doubt in your mind because that’s their mission. That’s what our mission is about – knowing what we stand for and what we will take action to move towards. It’s only once we know this can be move onto looking at who else might want to journey with us.

Guides and Travellers

Once we understand our mission it’s important we find people who are going to be able to help us. We might be able to get out of the creek on our own but we stand a better chance if we find people to guide us and others we can travel with.

The step in the process is as much about our relationship with our network as it is building the network. We can have 1000’s of people in our network but if they don’t like or trust us what’s the point!

The Guides and Travellers step is about identifying your potential network. It’s also about developing relationships with those who boost our energy and minimising our time spent with those who drain our energy.

Map

When we’re up the creek it’s not always easy to understand the routes out of the creek especially when the tall creek walls are surrounding us. It’s easy to think there are no routes out and believe ourselves to be stuck.

Plotting a map with all the possible routes out helps expands our thinking and understand all the possibilities that exist. In the long term we’d like to understand the routes that will help us achieve our mission. In the short term we may have other missions to accomplish.

Compass

When walking even if we’ve got a map we use a compass to help plot the course and help us understand where we are in relation to the map and our intended destination.

We have our own inner compass, inner wisdom some would say intuition. Once we’ve got all the possible routes out of the creek it’s our inner compass our intuition that will determine which direction we take.

This step is also about being authentic and true to ourselves – following our own true north.

Paddle

Once we’ve undertaken the other steps there is only one way out of the creek and that’s to find our paddle and use it. That is take personal responsibility to take the necessary action to take the first and subsequent steps.

Which part of the above 7 steps do you need to spend some time on in order to get out of a creek in your life?

  

Alison Smith

The Purchasing Coach
Unlocking potential using unconventional tools

Postscript: a Landscaping Your Life website was launched in November 2015 - so for more on this effective process do please go and visit.

Photograph copyright by brother from Andrew Jones Photography.